The Mask We All Wear

Hopefully we’ve all seen Scooby Doo, and remember when they’ll make up this elaborate plan to catch the monster and somehow Scooby and Shaggy always find a way ruin it. Then my girl Velma, (she was the best of them all, change my mind!) would have to fix everything. When they unmasked the monster, it was someone whom they’ve never expected- We all have some unmasking to do, the unmasking of our egos to find someone we never expected. We can’t let our Scooby’s and Shaggy’s continue to ruin our master plan, we gotta get the gang back together. We need Velma.

Alright, I bet you have one question and that’s probably, “How on Earth do I figure out my ego aka the one thing standing in-between me and my true self?”. Well let me give you some examples of mine and I will let you take it from there. I was very self conscious about my body, therefore I was living way above my means to be able to afford designer makeup, expensive clothes, etc. I was envious of other girls with thinner physiques and how much attention they got, so I would adopt their behaviors and actions to get the attention I wanted, mostly in negative catty ways. I actually was super shy at first but in order for me to keep up that persona, I had to step out of my comfort zone and become a people person, (which does wonders for building speaking and people skills). Weird how the ego has its ways of working a negative into a positive. Now was I buying these expensive things for myself, no, I was doing them to please others and avoid judgment and criticism. I hope from me giving you some examples you are able to come up with what drives your ego, if you’re having difficulties, refer to my post, Destroy The Ego for extra help.

Now if you remember from my previous post, When Is Enough Truly Enough, I asked you guys to do something and that was write a list of the things that you would do if you received no hate, judgement or criticism, by other people and by yourself to yourself. I put down on my list, Start a blog ; ). I thought my writing was inadequate and no one would every read it. But look at me know! I believed in myself and now others are starting to believe in me too which helps fuel my ambition and growth!

Once you have your list, look at it. Look at the most important one to you at this moment, most likely the one at the top of the list, (the most important are always top of mind), how would you feel if that became reality right now? Ask yourself, what’s the reason behind me writing that down and what’s stopping me from manifesting that. Some excuses that’ll come up like, I don’t have enough time, that’s a lie. In order for this to work you have to be honest, you have time, you just CHOOSE not to make that time. The only person stopping you, is you.- This. Activity. Right. Here. Is still to this day, the most monumental and impactful one that I’ve done. It showed me that not only, I had known who my true self was all along but that she was closer than I thought.

Next step, how do I get her free. “How do I strip this ‘mask’ off?! What are the people going to think?! I can’t imagine the things they’ll say about me!”. My exact thoughts when I started this journey. Where there is change and creativity, there will always be criticism of it. The difference is, is how you handle and deal with those emotions and feelings. Here are a few quotes from Marie Ferleo’s book-Everything’s Figoureoutable on the subject of criticism:

  • “Why should the way you fell depend on the thoughts in someone else’s head?”
  • “Everyone has a right to their opinion. But opinions are subjective. Just because someone doesn’t like what you do doesn’t mean no one else will.”
  • My personal favorite: “Would you allow someone to walk into your house, squat in you living room, and take a hot, steaming dump on your rug, and then walk out, leaving you to clean it up? I hope not. When you hear nasty, baseless criticism, reject it. Refuse it. Say, “Nope. You can’t take me down. I won’t give you that power. I don’t allow anyone to take a shit in my living room.”

Number one rule I follow when it comes to handling any sort of judgement or criticism, no ones taking a shit in my living room. Imagine the opportunities that’ve passed by because you let the criticism and judgment of another person discourage you. What I fear the most going forward is, that I let someones opinion of me alter a decision I make for myself, and 10 years down the road, I look back and it’d be missed opportunity that would’ve gotten me closer to my goals.

Now, we know what our ego consists of, we learned the ways to find our true selves and have begun preparing for any criticism and judgement that’ll come our way, we have our master plan. The only entity’s standing in-between us and the unmasking are our Scooby’s and Shaggy’s, aka our fear. (next blog post).

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